


I Might As Well Be The One

by jensenisafallenangel



Series: Only The Good Die Young [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bad Parenting, Bisexual Dean Winchester, Blow Jobs, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, First Time, Graduation, Idiots in Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Smut, very explicit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-09
Updated: 2017-08-14
Packaged: 2018-11-29 18:41:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11446764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jensenisafallenangel/pseuds/jensenisafallenangel
Summary: Dean and Cas have their first argument but Sam and their friends are convinced they can get past it. The two have to figure out what they want and what's worth fighting for.





	1. Chapter 1

The Monday after the carnival, Dean only saw Cas in their two classes and he was quiet. When he wasn’t at lunch, Dean became worried. 

“Where could he be?” Dean said. 

Kevin shrugged. Dean kept looking around the cafeteria expecting to see Cas.

“Is he pissed at you?” Charlie guessed as she ate.

“No?” Dean replied. “I don’t think so.”

“Did you see him this weekend?” Kevin offered.

“Yeah, we went to the carnival Friday night and then back to his place,” Dean said, “then I went home.”

Dean thought about it and remembered he didn’t text Cas when he said he would.

“Shit.”

He threw out the rest of his lunch and went to the library. Cas was at his usual table, studying even though the year was just about done.

“Cas, hey man. Can I talk to you?” Dean asked, standing with his hands in his jean pockets.

“I suppose,” Cas answered, eyes on his books.

“So, I gotta apologize,” Dean started. “I said I would text and I didn’t. My dad heard some shit about us from the carnival and I just went to bed. I wasn’t thinking. I’m sorry.”

“I’m not mad about that.”

That threw Dean for a loop.

“No?”

“No,” Cas said. “I’m not mad at all.”

“Then, what’s going on? You’re quiet all day, you’re in here for lunch…”

“I officially came out. To my mom.”

Dean let that hang for a second. 

“Shit. How did…”

“As well as one would expect.”

“That good, huh?” Dean let out a half-hearted laugh in a poor attempt to diffuse the tension.

Cas dropped his pencil and looked up.

“So, that’s it. I can’t pay for anything on my own. College? I can’t go. I can’t…”

“What are you talking about, Cas?” Dean sat down. 

“I can’t be gay. She won’t pay for anything if I am.”

“That’s bullshit. But my dad doesn’t pay for much and I get by just fine, me and Sammy,” Dean argued.

“What about college? I’m guessing your dad isn’t expecting you to go,” Cas snapped.

“Low blow but no I don’t suppose anyone is,” Dean answered. “I’m barely graduating on time from here.”

Cas closed his eyes and let out a deep breath.

“That was low. I’m sorry,” Cas said. “I am proud of you for graduating here. I know how smart you really are.”

Dean rubbed the back of his neck and let the compliments go unnoticed.

“But,” Cas continued. “We need a break. Until I figure out what to do.”

“Well, I wouldn’t want to hold you back from college,” Dean shrugged. “I… never mind. Have a nice life.”

He ran out of there before he let Cas see him start to cry. 

 

Dean couldn’t believe this. He slammed his fist into the bathroom wall.

“Fuck!” he screamed, clutching his hand to his chest. 

That hurt like a son of a bitch. He let tears flow as he gripped the sink, knuckles turning white.

How could Cas give up, not fight? That didn’t seem like him. And for what, college? To be some boring nerd with the two point five kids and white picket fence?

Fuck. Maybe Dean wanted part of that, too. Maybe he wanted that with Cas. Family and stability and shit.

Even though it could fuck his chances to graduate, Dean left after shooting a text to Sam he would be back to pick him up.

At home, he found his dad nursing a bottle of beer on the couch.

“Shouldn’t you be at work?” Dean fumed.

“Shouldn’t you be at school?” John sneered.

“The fuck you care?” Dean said, knowing this was dangerous. 

“Of course I care,” John said. “I’m your father.”

_Fuck it _, Dean thought before spilling.__

__“I’m home because my boyfriend’s homophobic mother made him choose between dating me and going to college. She’d cut him off,” Dean ranted. “I got pissed, punched a wall. Came home.”_ _

__A range of emotions went across John’s face._ _

__“Boyfriend.”_ _

__“Yeah.”_ _

__John nodded._ _

__“Guess I’ll pack,” Dean suggested._ _

__“What for?” John asked._ _

__“Aren’t you throwing me out?” Dean asked, very confused._ _

__“No,” John answered._ _

__Dean stood awkwardly, not sure what was happening._ _

__“It might take me a while to get used to it but that’s who you are. I’ve kind of always known.”_ _

__“Didn’t you say…”_ _

__“I know what I said,” John interrupted. “Throwing you out wouldn’t change you and I’m not losing my son over something so ridiculous. Mary would come back and haunt my ass ‘til kingdom come.”_ _

__Dean just nodded. It was hard to take in the fact that John was accepting him._ _

__“This is weird. Just saying,” Dean managed._ _

__John laughed._ _

__“I’m sorry I haven’t been the father you boys deserve. Maybe there’s something I can do.”_ _

__“Like what?”_ _

__“What’s your boyfriend’s name?”_ _

__

__Dean sat nervously at home with Sam. John and he picked him up from school and then John dropped them back at home._ _

__“I’m telling you, an alien abducted the real John and gave us a different one who gives a shit,” Dean explained. “I sort of came out to tell him about what happened at school today.”_ _

__He then told Sam everything that happened, too._ _

__“Shit. I’m sorry, Dean. So, where did Dad go?”_ _

__Dean just shrugged._ _

__At that, his phone rang._ _

__“Dean, what did you do?” Cas yelled into the phone._ _

__“So much for breaking up with me,” Dean joked. “What’s going on?”_ _

__“Your father,” Cas said. “He is in my house, downstairs yelling at my parents.”_ _

__“What the fuck for?”_ _

__“Because apparently our love is nothing to be ashamed of,” Cas snapped. “What did you tell him? Why did you send him?”_ _

__“I didn’t send him,” Dean said angrily. “I told him your dick move today and I was shocked he didn’t kill me. I guess he’s dad of the year now and is making up for all the years he fucked up.”_ _

__“Why does he have to be super dad now? Why?” Cas said._ _

__“Look,” Dean said with a sigh. “You clearly don’t care about me so why are you even calling me?”_ _

__“Of course I care about you,” Cas argued. “I just…oh shit. Your dad left, now my parents are calling me. I have to go.”_ _

__Cas hung up before Dean could say anything._ _

__

__Dean paced in the living room until he heard the key in the front door._ _

__“Dad, what the hell?”_ _

__“I was doing you a favor!” John defended._ _

__“Yeah, thanks a lot!” Dean yelled. “They’re probably going to kill him now!”_ _

__“Don’t yell at me, son,” John said, using the voice that always made Dean stand tall and shut up._ _

__Not this time._ _

__“I’m glad you’re on board with this and all but that was a terrible idea,” Dean snapped. “What if they hurt him? Or move away and I never see him again?”_ _

__John didn’t have anything to say._ _

__“I have to text him and make sure he’s okay.”_ _

__Dean stormed off to his room and texted Cas._ _

__**Dean: Please tell me you’re okay. ******__

********

__“What happened?” Sam asked._ _

********

__“Dad decided to go fight the Novaks on my behalf and probably got Cas in deep shit.”_ _

********

__“Oh,” Sam said._ _

********

__Dean looked down as his phone vibrated._ _

********

__**Cas: Fine. Can you come pick me up? ******__

************ ** **

__**Dean: Yeah, I’ll be right there ******__

**************** ** ** ** **

__“I gotta go,” Dean told Sam._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Dean thought he would have to encounter his dad but John wasn’t around. Outside, the Impala roared to life and Dean drove to Cas’s._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Cas ran up to the passenger side door as soon as Dean got there._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“What happened?”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Lot of yelling,” Cas said, trying to hide tears. “I don’t know what’s… I don’t know where my parents stand on the whole thing. They still seemed really pissed.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“So you just figure you’d call me to come save you?” Dean asked, eyes glued to the road._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“I needed to get out of there and you’re the only person I could think of to call,” Cas explained. “I get it if you’re still mad…”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Oh, mad about you breaking up with me?” Dean lashed out. “Why would I be mad?”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Dean, I wasn’t really given a choice.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“You always have a choice,” Dean retorted. “You just made the easy choice, not the right one.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Cas didn’t answer._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Dean kept driving around their town, not really thinking about a destination. He wished they could spend time like this on better terms but Cas put a wrinkle in that plan._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Look, I get it,” Dean shrugged. “Even if we had stayed together, we wouldn’t have had any future. You’ll go to college and forget all about me.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“That’s not true,” Cas defended._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Dean made a noise of disbelief and took a right turn harder than necessary._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“If you can’t talk to me and have a conversation, just take me home,” Cas sighed._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__The car was quiet as Dean headed in the direction of the Novak house._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Cas…”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Cas waited for Dean to continue._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“I just don’t get it,” he looked over. “Why didn’t you fight harder for us? Why did you just give up? I thought…I thought this was going well.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“It was,” Cas agreed. “But I need to think about my future.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“And you don’t want me in it.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“I do,” Cas fought. “I just need a little bit of time to figure everything out.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Sure, sure,” Dean taunted as they pulled into Cas’s driveway. “I’ll just crawl back whenever you figure your shit out. Let me know.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__It was harsher than he wanted to be but he was hurt._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Cas just shot him a glare before getting out of the car._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Dean sped off without looking back._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__

**************** ** ** ** **

__With graduation a few days away, Dean was called down to the guidance counselor’s office._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“You know why you’re here?” his counselor, Missouri Mosely, asked._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Dean shrugged but could only guess it was because he wasn’t graduating._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“It’s official, Dean,” she said. “You’re graduating.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Seriously?” Dean asked._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Do I look like I’m kidding?” she replied._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“No ma’am,” Dean laughed. “Thank you.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Get back to class,” she said with a hint of a smile._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__He went back with a barely contained smile on his face, shocked he actually pulled it off. His grades sucked and he had no idea what he would do next with his life, but damn it felt good to accomplish this._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__He wanted to tell Sam and the new and improved version of his dad. He wanted to tell…_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Cas._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Just like that, his good mood was shattered. He walked into physics and saw Cas sitting there. Dean looked away and sat down as the teacher droned on._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__His thoughts wandered to their dates, making out, the fact that Cas could make him feel important. Now, it was like none of that happened. Cas was just willing to forget it. Dean tried not to let it get to him and to focus on the fact he made it but that was easier said than done._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__

**************** ** ** ** **

__After school, Dean leaned against the Impala waiting for Sam. His cigarette hung from his lips, almost forgotten as Dean let his mind wander back to Cas._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Hello, Dean,” he heard, making him jump._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Speak of the devil._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“You can’t just sneak up on people, man,” Dean said to Cas._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Apologies,” Cas answered._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__They stood for a moment, Dean waiting for Cas to say what he wanted._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Can we talk?” Cas asked._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“We already are,” Dean countered, inhaling on his cigarette._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Cas let out a deep breath, more exasperated than anything._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“I wanted to tell you I’m sorry,” Cas began. “For everything.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Dean glanced at him briefly without saying anything and exhaled the smoke he held in._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“I never should have let my parents tell me how to live or tell me I’m wrong for being who I am. I’ve never disobeyed them, ever. This is all new to me, Dean.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“I’m glad you found your backbone,” Dean jeered. “What does that have to do with me?”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“I can’t expect your forgiveness, I know I hurt you. I just want you to know that you’re still very important to me and I care about you. I want us to…”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“If you say ‘still be friends,’ I swear to God I’ll kick your ass,” Dean answered angrily._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Cas stayed quiet as Dean smashed the butt of his cigarette under his boot._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Cas, I want to be with you,” Dean admitted. “That’s it.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“It’s not that easy,” Cas replied._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Actually, Cas, it is.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Sam ran up to them at that moment._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Hi, Cas!” he greeted._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Hello, Sam,” Cas answered._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Let’s go,” Dean said to Sam, getting in to the Impala._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Sam shot Cas an apologetic look before getting in the car._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Are you still mad at Cas?” Sam asked._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“That’s none of your damn business,” Dean snapped._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Come on, Dean,” Sam insisted. “I’m your brother and I’m not an idiot. I know you two love each other.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” Dean mumbled._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Yes, I do.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Shut up.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“That means I’m right,” Sam grinned._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Doesn’t mean anything,” Dean shrugged. “Sometimes, love isn’t enough for people.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__

**************** ** ** ** **

__Dean woke up on the day of his graduation with a hangover. Maybe stealing his dad’s whiskey to get Cas out of his head was a bad idea but he didn’t care. He wasn’t going to let anything ruin this day. Instead of moping, he went and took a shower._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__At the school, John and Sam went to get seats and Dean tried to find his friends to sit with on the football field. Kevin and Charlie found him first but they also had Cas with them. Dean said a general hello to everyone and they went to sit down. Dean kept telling himself not to mess anything up, just be quiet and get his diploma._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__When they sat down in the stadium, Dean made sure Charlie and Kevin were in between him and Cas. He tried to be subtle but no such luck._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Oh, hey, do you want to switch?” Charlie asked. “You probably want to be by…”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“I’m fine,” Dean said._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“You sure? We don’t mind moving,” Kevin added._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Seriously. It’s fine,” Dean grumbled._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__They knew better than to press and Cas didn’t offer any explanation._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Halfway through the ceremony of boring, cliché speeches and the reading of names, Charlie couldn’t hold back anymore._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Okay, spill,” she whisper-yelled. “What’s going on with you two?”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Ask him,” Dean said, eyes glued to the stage._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Charlie and Kevin both looked at Cas._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“It’s…it’s nothing,” Cas stammered. “I don’t think this is the place…”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Dean let out a harsh laugh. Cas looked down, shame turning his ears red._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“I told him we needed a break because of my parents,” Cas said, barely audible. “They threatened to cut me off.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Oh,” Kevin and Charlie said._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“So, even though we went on some great dates and I thought it was going well…” Dean started._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“It was,” Cas interrupted._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Cas didn’t think that was enough,” Dean continued without pause. “He needs mommy and daddy’s approval.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Don’t pretend you don’t care what your father thinks. I know you wanted him to accept you for who you are,” Cas retorted._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Dean just rolled his eyes._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__It was time for their row to go up for their diplomas but that didn’t stop their argument._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“You know I’m new to relationships so yes, the first sign of trouble, I ran,” Cas tried to explain. “But I know better now. I know my parents’ opinions don’t matter, their money doesn’t matter. All that matters is you.”_ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Dean didn’t turn around and just that sink in._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Where was that a week ago?” he finally said._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__That got Cas to smile. When they got back to their seats, Charlie and Kevin happily let them sit next to each other._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“You’re sure you’re not going to bail on me again?” Dean asked, leaning in towards Cas._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“I am,” Cas said with certainty._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Maybe Sam was right about them loving each other and maybe Charlie was right to push them to talk it out. All Dean knew for sure was that this felt right. It felt right for them to share this milestone and to be thinking about the future together._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“I’m the best,” Charlie said, nodding at Dean and Cas holding hands._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Kevin had to agree._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__

**************** ** ** ** **

__Once the ceremony was over, everyone in the stadium poured out of it. The ensuing chaos made it hard but eventually Dean found his dad and Sam._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Congratulations, Dean,” John said with a smile._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Sam echoed the sentiment and they chatted about the ceremony, the one kid who tripped and the beach balls that got snuck in and blown up when Cas walked up with his parents._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“This must be Castiel,” John said, his face hard to read._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Hello, Mr. Winchester,” Cas answered._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__John gave a curt nod to Cas’s parents who looked like they would be more comfortable anywhere else but there._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Well, this is awesome,” Dean quipped softly, getting a smile out of Cas._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“As fun as this is, my sons and I are going out to dinner to celebrate,” John stated._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Can Cas come?” Dean asked._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__John thought about it for a second before giving in._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“If it’s all right with his parents,” John added._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Naomi looked like she was going to argue but Cas’s dad cut her off and said it was fine. They walked away without another word._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__“Yay!” Sam yelled._ _

**************** ** ** ** **

__Dean laughed and put an arm around Cas, thinking maybe everything would work out._ _

**************** ** ** ** **


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning! Smut and cheesy happy ending.

Dinner was at the nicest place in town. Apparently, as part of his improved self, John had worked extra hours and made a reservation a while ago. The place was packed with other families celebrating the graduation.

“So, Cas,” John asked. 

Dean tensed a little, nervous what John was going to ask. 

“What are your plans now?” he continued.

Dean tried not to be obvious letting out the breath he had held.

“I’m off to college in the fall,” Cas answered.

“Do you know what you’re going to study?” Sam chimed in.

“Not yet,” Cas replied. “I like history, art, literature… a lot of things.”

His focus dropped back to his food. Dean turned to him as John told Sam to put his napkin on his lap, pointing out that they were in a “classy joint.”

“It’s okay to geek out,” Dean said. “It’s cute you like all those nerdy things.”

“Nerdy?” Cas said. “Those things are what humanity is all about! Expression and creativity!”

Dean just smiled as Cas proved his point getting excited about his favorite topics.

“To Dean and Cas graduating,” John interrupted for a toast.

“What a miracle I pulled off,” Dean joked.

“Hey,” Cas said sharply. “You are smart. We’re all very proud of you.”

John looked impressed that Cas put his son in his place like that and Sam agreed that he was proud of his big brother. They clinked their glasses together and drank to their accomplishment.

The rest of dinner went just as smoothly and John seemed to genuinely like Cas. Dean didn’t blame him, the guy was great, but he had concerns their relationship would be the only thing John focused on. 

 

Back at the Winchester household, John went off drinking with some buddies and Sam said he was going out with a girl from school named Jess.

“Be smart, Sammy,” Dean winked.

Sam just crinkled his nose in response before getting in to the minivan drove by Jess’s mom in the driveway.

“How horrible, not being able to drive,” Dean joked, clutching his chest like the thought caused him actual pain. 

“You’re being ridiculous,” Cas said with a playful eye roll. 

“Maybe,” Dean said.

A smirk pulled on his lips as he stepped closer to Cas, eyes with the hint of mischief that drew Cas in every damn time.

“Is it ridiculous to remind you we have the house to ourselves?” Dean said, voice low and sexy.

“No,” Cas whispered. 

Dean pulled Cas in by his hips for a kiss, deep and wanting. He eased Cas’s mouth open gently and nipped at his bottom lip just to tease him a little.

Dean kissed down Cas’s jaw and neck before sucking on his pulse point, hard enough to bruise.

“Yes,” Cas let out in a huff, head thrown back. “Let everyone see it.”

That was all Dean needed to hear to make sure the bruise would be visible to their parents and anyone else.

“Can…” Dean started. “I want to try something. Been wanting to for a while.”

“I don’t know if I’m ready…”

“Not all the way, if you’re not…that can wait,” Dean reassured. “I want…”

“What?” Cas needed to know.

“I really want to suck you off,” Dean said, hand rubbing the back of his neck. “Every since I had you in my hand, I want to taste…”

Cas cut him off with a desperate kiss.

“Of course,” he said when they broke for air.

Dean led them to the bedroom he shared with Sam. Even though Dean’s was only a thin twin bed, he was determined to make this work. He had to taste Cas on his tongue, feel his release.

They didn’t bother with shirts or shoes, Dean just eased Cas back onto the bed and leaned over him.

“You okay?” Dean asked.

“Yes,” Cas replied. “What do we do…”

Dean showed him, grinding his hips down hard. Cas let out a moan, encouraging Dean to grind again. His hand ran down Cas’s chest, rubbing his nipples over his shirt enough to get a gasp out of his boyfriend.

Cas had his hands on Dean’s shoulders, feeling the muscles as Dean propped himself up above him, but ran them down Dean’s back to grab Dean’s ass.

“Damn, Cas,” Dean groaned as Cas pulled Dean down to move their erections together.

Dean slid his hand down to palm Cas over his jeans, getting a string of curses in response.

“My, my,” Dean grinned. “Where did you learn that filth?”

“Ask my boyfriend,” Cas huffed, absent-mindedly shoving his hips up to rut against Dean’s hand.

“He sounds sexy,” Dean teased before kissing Cas.

He took his time rubbing Cas and kissing him before sliding Cas’s jeans and boxers down to his knees, freeing his cock.

Dean took in the moment, letting the anticipation build to really taste Cas for the first time.

“You’re sure?” Dean had to know.

“Yes, Dean,” Cas answered. “Please.”

Still fully clothed, Dean got to work taking care of Cas. He started with a long stripe licked up the underside of Cas’s cock, swirling his tongue around the head and slit, and repeated that a few times. 

“Fuck,” Cas moaned. “Fuck, Dean, more.”

Happy to please, Dean really got into it. He sucked down Cas’s full length in one go, bobbing his head with his lips fairly loose to drive Cas wild. Judging by the cursing and praising and begging, Dean figured he had Cas right where he wanted him.

A few bobs up and down the shaft with serious suction and pressure, Dean had no warning before Cas was spilling down his throat with a shout of Dean’s name. A string of cum connected from Dean’s bottom lip to Cas’s cock and another string dribbled down his chin until he licked it all up.

“Oh my God,” Cas praised. “That was…”

Dean just smiled.

Cas pulled him in for a kiss, tasting his own release all over Dean’s mouth.

“Can I try?” Cas asked.

That sent any blood that wasn’t there already right down to Dean’s dick.

“You sure?” Dean questioned. “You don’t have to if you…”

“I want to,” Cas insisted.

“Then I certainly won’t hold you back,” Dean quipped.

Cas got his pants on the rest of the way before looking at Dean with a look of puzzlement.

“Should… we should switch?”

“Right,” Dean agreed.

He let Cas up and laid back, allowing Cas to crawl above him.

“I’m a little nervous,” Cas admitted. “I don’t know…”

“You really don’t have to do this,” Dean reminded him.

“I want to, I just want to make you see stars like you did for me,” Cas explained.

“Babe, anything from you is enough to make me come,” Dean assured him.

Cas nodded but still looked uneasy.

“I’ll help you, okay?” Dean suggested.

Cas nodded again.

Dean kissed Cas and guided one of Cas’s hands down to palm over his jeans.

“Just like that, Cas,” Dean groaned, hips thrusting up. “Fuck yeah.”

Cas rubbed him until Dean undid his own pants, lifting his hips up to let Cas pull them down. He got his boxers out of the way and let his cock sit hard against his stomach, drips of pre-come already on the tip.

“Okay, you could start how I did,” Dean lead. “Just the tongue, base to tip.”

Cas didn’t hesitate to try.

“Oh, fuck,” Dean let out. “Yeah, just…nnnff, perfect.”

Dean let Cas get good at that, tongue flat and firm on the underside of his cock, before suggesting the next step.

“Just get the tongue around the head and slit, you know, like...”

He let out a loud groan as Cas tried, tongue swirling skillfully around his head.

“Oh shit, yes. Cas, yes,” Dean managed, hips jutting off the bed.

Without Dean instructing it, Cas went to suck Dean down. He got a little eager and choked when Dean’s tip hit the back of his throat.

“That’s the gag reflex, sweetheart,” Dean pointed out. “You’re doing great.”

Cas was more careful the next few times, just sucking Dean down halfway. The pressure from his beautiful pink lips and the way he moaned as he did was still very much doing it for Dean. He could feel his orgasm already building.

Cas kept sucking, his spit and Dean’s pre-come mixing to allow the filthiest sucking noises to fill the room.

“God, Cas, I’m gonna… fuck, fuck, Cas please, more… gonna come.”

He did, coming hard into Cas’s mouth. Dean could hear him choke a little and could see a lot dribble out of the side of his mouth but he kept sucking to make sure he took Dean all the way through his release. 

“Holy fuck,” Dean said, dropping his head back onto his pillow. “You were amazing.”

“Really?” Cas said, eyes bright and cum on his chin.

Those pink lips covered in cum got Dean’s spent dick to twitch but he ignored that.

“Yeah, I don’t know what you were worried about. You suck dick just fine.”

“I had a great teacher,” Cas laughed.

“Damn right.”

They cleaned up best they could and Dean yanked his jeans back up. They opted to snuggle up on the couch and flip on some old movie. Luckily they were too tired to try anything else on the couch because Sam came home and joined them not long after. 

Dean drove Cas home and gave him a nice, deep kiss at the front door to cap off the perfect graduation day.

 

A week after graduation, Cas suggested that they go mini-golfing. 

“Really?” Dean said, disbelief all over his face. “Mini-golfing.”

Cas looked away as they ate lunch at a local diner.

“If you think it’s dumb, we can do something else. I just always thought it seemed like a good date spot,” Cas explained.

Dean let out a sigh, hating to see Cas upset.

“It does sound good,” Dean gave in. “How could I could say no to you?” 

Cas squinted and tilted his head the side.

“Easily,” he answered. “In fact, very recently you said no to trying…”

“Okay, okay,” Dean said, hands up in surrender. “I’ll follow you anywhere and I’ll do what you want. Within reason. Let’s go mini-golfing.”

Once they got there, Dean pulled Cas in for a kiss in the front seat of the Impala. 

“What was that for?” Cas asked.

“Can’t a guy just kiss his boyfriend?” Dean smirked.

“Sure,” Cas agreed.

Their making out got a little rowdy apparently because a woman with her two young kids rapped on the window with a disgusted look. When she left, they kept making out, hands sliding under shirts and up thighs towards hardening…

An old lady knocked on the window this time, shouting and flipping the bird. 

Dean and Cas laughed again but decided they should cool off. After about ten minutes, they both felt decent enough to walk into public.

Cas paid even though Dean tried and just told his boyfriend he could buy them snacks afterwards. 

On the first hole, they could feel eyes from the people they had scarred with their very public displays of affection. Cas looked away while Dean waved at them.

“Dean, stop,” Cas laughed, pulling Dean’s arm back down.

“Careful or I’ll make out with you right here,” Dean beamed. “Take your pants off…”

“Knock it off!” Cas ordered but with a smile. 

They kept playing, going back and forth with who was in the lead.

“I used to take Sammy here all the time,” Dean said.

“We had church things here a few times and kids at school had parties when they had to invite everyone,” Cas added.

“Those always sucked,” Dean laughed. “Never had one but definitely went to a few. Eat shit pizza and sing ‘happy birthday’ to a kid you don’t really know? What a joke.”

The fourteenth hold was a difficult one with a windmill but they both managed holes in two.

When they were done, it ended up being an even tie.

“Match made in heaven,” Dean winked before going to buy snacks.

He came back with grape Slushees and soft pretzels with cheese dip.

“How nutritious,” Cas pointed out.

“Shush,” Dean chastised. “You don’t eat it for the nutrition.”

They drank until their mouths were purple and they had brain freezes. The pretzel was gone fast, too.

“What now?” Cas asked.

“I actually promised Sam some bro time so we’re gorging on popcorn and soda until our teeth hurt,” Dean said. “What about tomorrow?”

“Saturday? I’m free.”

“Awesome,” Dean smiled. “I can come over?” 

“Of course,” Cas answered. “My parents will be at church and will try to make me go but I’ll make up an excuse.”

“You don’t want to admit to hanging out with your boyfriend?” Dean smirked.

“They’re getting used to the idea,” Cas said, putting a hand on Dean’s arm. “I don’t want to push it.”

“Probably best,” Dean agreed. “Let’s get you home before they get their pitchforks.”

Cas managed a laugh at that and followed Dean to the Impala. 

At Cas’s front door, Dean gave Cas their usual kiss but held him close after they finished.

“I gotta apologize,” Dean said.

“For what?” Cas said, head tilted and eyebrows furrowed.

“For thinking mini golf wouldn’t be fun,” Dean admitted. “I should trust you.”

“Well, now you know,” Cas joked. “You need to have faith.”

“I do,” Dean explained. “In you.”

That got a half-smile from Cas and another kiss for Dean who checked his watch and saw he was cutting it close with Sam and said he had to go.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Cas!” Dean waved as he walked away.

“Bye Dean!” Cas waved back, waiting until he couldn’t see the Impala anymore before going inside. 

 

Dean brought a couple of movies that he knew Cas hadn’t seen and figured they’d spend the day relaxing and watching them. Cas opened the door right as Dean got to it.

“Hey to you, too,” Dean laughed.

“Good morning,” Cas said. “I had something else in mind than movies.”

Cas stepped aside to let Dean in, who looked confused as he kicked off his shoes.

“My parents tried to drag me to church this morning but I told them I refused. They were pissed but I can go later,” Cas explained.

“So, what did you have in mind for today?” Dean asked. “You look kind of tired.”

“I couldn’t sleep,” Cas said, stepping into Dean’s space. “I knew last night was the last night I would go to sleep as a virgin.”

“A what now?” Dean replied, eyes wide.

Cas pulled Dean in by his hips for a kiss, deep and eager. 

“Whoa, Cas, we don’t have to …”

“It’s been long enough and I know you’ve wanted to…”

“Well, yeah, but…”

“Then what’s stopping us?”

Dean let that question hang in the air.

“Nothing,” he swallowed hard in anticipation. “Nothing at all.” 

“Good,” Cas nodded.

He kissed Dean again, a little more relaxed this time. Dean could feel the difference in past kisses, Cas really was making Dean hard already.

“Upstairs?” Dean asked.

Cas took his hand and pulled him up the stairs.

“Hey, I’m excited too but let’s not rush it, okay?” Dean said as he nearly tripped up the last step. 

Cas didn’t answer and just pulled Dean into his room and shut the door. He kissed Dean and backed him up the bed where he gently pushed him back onto it. Cas crawled over Dean, not touching him, until his lips reached Dean’s ear.

“They say there’s a heaven for those who will wait,” Cas whispered. “Some say it’s better but I say it ain’t.”

Dean let out a groan, frustrated by the lack of contact. 

“Cute, Billy Joel,” Dean managed. “Now take off your clothes.”

At that, Dean could tell Cas hesitated. They hadn’t been completely naked with each other yet and maybe he doubted his plan.

“At your own pace,” Dean suggested. “I’ll start.”

Dean let Cas give him room to reach down and pull his socks off. Cas followed his lead and then took his own shirt off. Dean’s mouth went dry, taking in the muscles and skin and nipples and…

“Dean?” Cas asked.

“What?”

“Can I take your shirts off?” 

Dean nodded and raised his arms to help Cas get his shirt off after he threw his flannel to the side.

“You doing okay?” Dean asked.

“Of course,” Cas said firmly.

He eased Dean back and got on top of him again. Like their other times together, he moved his hips down to press again Dean’s, getting a moan that he swallowed into a kiss. As they kissed, getting sloppier and wetter as they went, Cas kept a steady movement of his hips grinding and circling, feeling himself get hard against Dean’s own erection.

“Fuck,” Dean said, breaking the kiss. “If we keep this up, I’m going to come in my pants like a teenager.”

“Dean, you are a teenager,” Cas reminded him.

“Not one that does that,” Dean argued.

“Not today, maybe,” Cas said, a wicked promise in there somewhere. 

Dean thought about Cas dry-humping him until he came but ignored that before he actually did it.

Instead, Dean hesitantly reached for Cas’s jeans and started to undo the top button and then the zipper. Cas reciprocated, pulling Dean’s jeans down as he lifted his hips. They tossed their pants to the floor and Cas climbed on top to feel this new level of closeness, barely any fabric between their cocks. Both of their briefs had wet spots of precome and they were straining hard against them.

Cas moved his hips slowly, just to feel it and hear Dean moan his name. 

“Okay, next part,” Cas said abruptly.

He jumped off, Dean whining a little at the loss of contact, and crawled to his bedside table to get lube and a condom.

Dean leaned over to smack Cas’s ass.

“Can’t beat the view!” he teased.

“Do you want to hit it or be inside it?” Cas teased right back.

“Second one,” Dean agreed. “I’m going to make you feel so good.”

Cas pulled off his briefs and tossed them near his pants. Dean watched, seeing Cas totally naked for him. Cas laid on his back, handing Dean the lube.

“Go ahead,” Cas insisted.

“You’re sure?” 

“I’m on my back, naked for you and handing you lube,” Cas said, eyebrows raised. “What do you think?”

Dean nodded. He eased Cas’s knees apart, taking everything in. To keep Cas hard, he licked and sucked his dick a couple times and played with his balls before finally coating a finger in lube. He kissed Cas’s thighs, moving closer and closer before reaching his hole and pressing the finger in, just the tip at first then more with Cas’s moans of encouragement.

“How does it feel?” Dean asked, finger in and playing around.

“Weird,” Cas admitted. “But good. Weird good.”

Dean took his time, playing with one finger in and out for a while, then adding a second. He got Cas writhing and twitching, cock leaking, when he found his prostate. He pressed along there a few times and scissored his fingers.

Three fingers had Cas incoherently mumbling and moaning, sweat dripping down his chest that Dean licked and then played with his nipples a bit with his tongue.

“Is your dick going to feel this good?” Cas asked, back arching as Dean crooked his fingers.

“Better,” Dean promised, leaning down for a kiss.

Dean made sure his three fingers had stretched Cas out well before getting the condom on and lubing up. Cas let Dean bend his legs up towards his chest and Dean lined his cock up right at Cas’s entrance.

“Please,” Cas begged. “Want you to fuck me.”

Dean leaned over to kiss Cas first, letting the tip of his cock press against Cas’s sensitive hole just enough to get a groan.

He leaned back and eased his cock inch by inch into Cas, slow as he could. Cas was still so tight, hot around Dean’s cock as he was fully seated.

“Feel okay?” Dean asked.

“Amazing,” Cas answered. “Move, please. Want to feel you move.”

Dean, still going extremely slow, eased out and back in a few times. 

“You feel so good around me, Cas,” Dean groaned. “Fuck.”

“Fuck me harder, Dean.”

“I will, babe, I will,” Dean promised. “Trust me.”

He built up a rhythm, slowly getting faster and harder.

“More, Dean, please,” Cas begged under him. “Fuck me.”

Dean got faster, finally slamming into Cas like he wanted, the noise of slick skin slapping together filling the air with their moans and gasps of each other’s name.

“Yes, Dean, fuck, yes, yes,” Cas was starting to yell.

Dean kept pounding Cas’s tight hole, on the edge listening to Cas scream his name.

“Gonna come, come with me,” Dean managed, hips faltering as he reached his orgasm.

“Fuck,” Cas yelled once more.

Dean fucked him through, spilling into Cas as watched him shoot white ropes of come onto his chest and stomach.

He pulled out and collapsed next to him, both panting with lopsided grins.

“That…wow,” Cas laughed.

“Awesome,” Dean grinned. 

He leaned over to pull Cas into a kiss before suggesting they get cleaned up. Dean would have loved to snuggle but Cas knew his parents would be home soon.

When Cas’s parents came back from church, they found Dean and Cas a respectable distance from each other on the couch watching a movie. They went into the kitchen after saying hello.

“That’s so wild,” Cas shook his head. “They have no idea.”

“That we fucked?” Dean asked.

“Exactly.”

Dean pulled Cas closer on the couch to hold him.

“Sinners _definitely_ have much more fun,” Cas joked.

Dean kissed the top of Cas’s head.

“Are you going to let me live that talent show down?” Dean had to know.

“Never.”

When their movie was over, Cas walked Dean to the front door. 

“I had a great time today, Dean,” Cas grinned.

“Me too,” Dean agreed. “We should do it again sometime.”

“Absolutely.”

They kissed, Dean on the outside of the front door and Cas still inside his house.

“Good night,” Cas said. “Let me know when you get home.”

“Okay.”

Dean started to walk to his car.

“Dean?” 

Dean turned around.

“I love you.”

When Dean’s mouth just dropped open without any sound and he didn’t answer, Cas shut the door.

Dean stood for a second trying to process what just happened. Did he mean that? He walked all the way to the driver’s side door when he remembered Sam pointing out how Dean and Cas loved each other. The kid was right.

Dean ran up to the front door and knocked like a madman until Cas opened it.

“I love you, too,” Dean said before kissing Cas.

He drove home with a big dopey grin on his face and he knew that no matter what happened, he and Cas would be okay.

 

 

 

FOUR YEARS LATER

Dean hadn’t been this nervous since that infamous talent show. He knew that ended well and hopefully this would too but that didn’t stop the crazy butterflies wreaking havoc in his stomach. There were so many “what-if’s” running through his head, he was getting dizzy.

At Cas’s front door, he tried to stay calm and cool and it seemed to be working because Cas didn’t seem to think Dean was nuts. Well, any more than usual.

They drove to the restaurant that Dean had taken Cas to for their first date. The conversation stayed light, Cas helping Dean relax without even trying. They talked about how Cas was about to graduate from college, with honors of course, and how proud Dean was. Cas was proud of Dean taking over John’s garage when the man retired and thinking about going to night school for a degree. 

“I always knew you were sentimental, Dean,” Cas said.

“What do you mean?” Dean pretended not to know.

“This is where we had our first date,” Cas pointed out.

“So it is,” Dean said coyly over his water glass.

Cas shook his head with a smile, loving the way his boyfriend never failed to make him smile.

Dean paid and drove Cas home to his parents’ house where he stayed when he was in town. He had an apartment by his school and the distance had been trying for Dean and Cas but it was almost over. Cas would be home soon, for good, and Dean had an idea of what home might mean for the two of them. 

The drive was quiet and almost tense. If Dean didn’t know any better, he would have guessed that Cas was upset.

“You okay?” Dean asked as he pulled into the driveway.

“It’s just…” Cas started. “I thought tonight would be different, the restaurant…everything.”

“Why don’t I just walk you up,” Dean said, unbuckling his seatbelt.

“But…”

“Do you trust me?” 

“Of course but…”

“Come on,” Dean insisted.

Dean led Cas onto the porch. The moment he had been freaking out about all night. 

“I think I know what you had in mind tonight, Cas,” Dean began. “I wanted to take you out to that restaurant but I wanted to do this here.”

“Do what?” Cas asked, head tilted to the side.

Dean got down on one knee. 

“I thought about doing this at the restaurant but I wanted this to be just us. We had our first kiss here and this is where we said we love each other for the first time. It means more, for me, to ask here. Will you marry me, Castiel Novak?”

“Of course,” Cas said, huge smile across his face.

Dean jumped up and gave Cas their regular kiss on the front porch, this time as fiancés. 

It was obvious to Dean that he never would have to be nervous about anything again with Cas by his side forever.


End file.
